Black Friday – Mini Riots Everywhere

Today, social media has been blowing up with video clips of humanity descending into a bestial warlike state in the quest to grab a flat screen for slightly cheaper than usual. ITS BLACK FRIDAY BITCHZZZ! So far our facebook feed has had all sorts of shameful indictements of existence, from these chubby chappies kicking off over some no name TV in Tesco:

To this all out warfare recorded in ASDA – again over some flat screen telly. MUST! HAVE! NEW! TV!

This one probably takes the top spot – these guys really know how to defend their right to some bargain pants:

Although there's something we're still puzzling over – if we assume that rioting = bad, and incitement to riot = v. bad, then shouldn't someone be getting in trouble for making this happen? Can't we arrest mindless consumerism (or, at the very least, the CEO of ASDA) under the new anti terror laws or something? Maybe we could get the student who got given a 6 month sentence for nicking £3.50s worth of bottled water during the London riots to preside over the case…