This Week… A Rocket Crashes Back to Earth!

Who knows where it will land? Will we all be wiped out in one fell swoop? Will it crash beneath the sea only to be found millions of years later amidst some sort of underwater utopia? Will it get shot down and explode like some sort of mad firework? The tension is unbearable… 

Anyway, back on planet Earth the Tories have done quite well in the local council elections and Labour have done quite badly. Is it really a surprise though given that we as a country voted for Brexit, enjoy Ant & Dec and want to build a £200 million yacht for a dead racist prince? Not really… 

Meanwhile out at sea fishermen are fighting over the right to fish, catching fish and whose fish are whose. In the midst of a pandemic this seems neither the time, nor the plaice for this. However I’m sure the EU will soon mussel in and sort all of this out… 

*sorry

Soon the under 40’s will be offered the vaccine which is excellent news as then we can all start partying hard and living life up like we should be. I for one can’t wait to return to the ‘club scene’ – i’m going to get right on it. 

Here’s the internet…