This Week... Kanye tries to make Kanye relevant again, Blancmange and Art

Commentary

"George Bush doesn't care about black people" – The Old Kanye

"When I put this MAGA hat on, it made me feel like Superman. [Donald Trump] made a Superman" – The New Kanye

"Those that are in the music business say that [Kanye West is] a genius, and that's okay with me because as far as I'm concerned, he is" – Donald Trump

"This is the most repulsive, disgraceful, embarrassing act of desperation and auctioning off of one’s soul to gain power I’ve ever seen… If you listen closely you can hear the tears of our ancestors hit the floor" – T.I.

"Up and down, I'm up the wall, I'm up the bloody tree…" – Blancmange

Hi there This Week'ers, when you're really feeling the music don't you just really want to vomit really hard? No? Okay. Leonard Cohen wrote a poem about Kanye West. Inspired by his words, I wrote my own. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did copying and pasting the same phrase repeatedly.

Kanye West is not Picasso
Picasso, Leonard Cohen and me think Kanye West is not as good old Kanye
Kanye West is not Picasso
Picasso, Leonard Cohen and me think Kanye West is not as good old Kanye
Kanye West is not Picasso
Picasso, Leonard Cohen and me think Kanye West not as good old Kanye
Kanye West is not Picasso
Picasso, Leonard cohen and me think Kanye West is not as good old Kanye
Kanye West is not Picasso
Picasso, Leonard Cohen and me think Kanye West is not as good old Kanye
Kanye West is not Picasso
Picasso, Leonard Cohen and me think Kanye West is not as good old Kanye

A US astronaut and a Russian cosmonaut were forced to make an emergency landing after their Russian Soyuz rocket malfunctioned en route to the International Space Station (ISS). Fuck that.

We've sourced their terrified last selfie during their ballistic descent to Earth.

There's a royal wedding tomorrow.

BBC, you trolling hard, no?

Dessert of the Week… Aperol Spritz Blancmange

Trippy Memory of the Week

Second Best Dessert of the Week… Vanilla Bean Blancmange

Best Song by Blancmange of the Week

Best Suspected Fraud of the Week

Oh, Valerie.

See ya l8rs, babes

Do you like art?

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Well, it's back! Art is back thanks to Banksy, who has wowed the world yet again after this…

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Do you like drugs? David Morales.

Do you like being Vegan? Do you eat avocados? If you answered yes to both of those…

Then you are now NOT a Vegan. But you are definitely more woke.

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Do you like silence? Do you like the length of time: 1 minute? Are you NOT scared of adults dressed in (mainly) cartoon animal costumes? If you agreed with all of those questions, then you will probably like this story.

Do you want a new job? The government has one up for grabs.

1. The Resilience and Emergency Division (RED) supports the Ministry of Housing, Communities and Local Government's (MHCLG) core objective of delivering local communities with excellent public services through enabling resilient localities: which can prepare for, respond to, and recover from civil emergencies of all types.

Hard emergency Brexit. No thanks.

The position was previously held by Mr Mulvarney, who stood down from the position after it was alleged he has stolen one Starbar from his local newsagent.