This Week...Big - Ransom Note

Commentary

"They would only have wasted the money on bingo anyway" – P. Green

"David Guetta plays a load of old ballbag" – S. Hans

"Fuck you" – Ghandi

When will it end? I mean seriously, this year has seemed to drag on and on and on while the world just waits for the slow passing of time to eventually envelope us all but alas, it does not come. It's difficult to think whether all the hardships of 2016 will ever be over or if this is just life now, an ever changing routine of celebrity death after celebrity death for all eternity. As we are living though it we might as well embrace it so here are the shit things that have happened this week.

DOING IT FOR THE KIDS

There were scenes of humility this week and for a moment I held a small amount of pride for our nation as we began to welcome in child migrants from the Calais jungle. 'Brilliant', I thought. 'Although it's only a handful at least these children who look like children who escaped war will be reunited with their families.' I am an idiot though and nothing I say should ever be believed so thankfully for the good of the nation I was debunked as it was quickly proven these children were not children at all, they were adults. Well, I say "proven", a few people used that Guess My Age app and discovered they were all in their 70s which is proof enough for me. I mean, we do have a thorough vetting and immigration process but if it wasn't for a free app you can download from iTunes we wouldn't know who was entering our country. I can't help but be fearful of this technology though, not because people are using this app designed for 'fun' to genuinely fuel a rhetoric of hate towards immigrants, but I am fearful because what if this technology falls into the wrong hands? What if migrants begin faceswapping themselves with members of the Royal Family and are allowed to walk into Buckingham Palace unquestioned? What if somebody use the bee lense on Snapchat and gets a cushty job making honey in the Cotswolds? It's happened before, just watch Tom Hanks in Big…