This Week... But First, Britain.

Commentary

"If Sadiq Khan wins London, I will run naked down Regent Street with a sausage up my bum in protest #LondonMayor2016" – Katie Hopkins

"My halal sausages are in order. I am a woman of my word." – Katie Hopkins

"If Sadiq Khan wins London, I will run naked down Regent Street with a sausage up my bum in protest #LondonMayor2016" – Katie Hopkins

"My halal sausages are in order. I am a woman of my word." – Katie Hopkins

"If Sadiq Khan wins London, I will run naked down Regent Street with a sausage up my bum in protest #LondonMayor2016" – Katie Hopkins

"My halal sausages are in order. I am a woman of my word." – Katie Hopkins

We have a new mayor of London and what a time it is to be alive, except if you’re the type of person who thinks the idea of a Muslim mayor of our great city is nothing short of a swift punch in the face to your Grandparents ideals. Wait, sorry what? “But I don’t care about a Mayor’s religious beliefs, hence why I and 1,310,142 others voted for him to be the chairman of this city” I hear you cry but you’d be wrong because 1,356,259 people ‘like’ Britain First on Facebook and that’s a bigger number so therefore is right.

If you didn’t receive the memo (you should check your spam folder) London has fallen. Although you may be looking out the window of you London office wondering why everything seems normal or why bus zero tube drivers were offered to the gods as a human sacrifice on your morning commute then well, you just need to wake up and smell the coffee (yes, not good old fashioned British tea. Coffee).

Oh don’t you just wish you could hark back to the days of post-War Britain when yes, huge parts of London were destroyed, poverty was rife, millions returned from war with undiagnosed post-traumatic stress disorder and homosexuality was treated with castration BUT you could just leave your door unlocked y’know? A simpler time. A time when Britain ruled the world (of ventriloquism shown on Saturday night television). A time when nobody knew what rice was. A time when Morris dancing was considered rebellious and provocative. A time when mass immigration meant a coach journey to Bridlington for the day and the EU was simply ‘those places that drink wine’. A time before the Kardashians. Where’s Winston Churchill’s fly-on-the-wall reality show eh? WHERE’S WINSTON CHURCHILL’S FUCKING REALITY SHOW?