Asking For A Friend #17

Is this real life?
We're stilll trying to cling on to some form of clarity in this brave new world but never fear Mitch Davis is back to help us to realise we're not actually as insane as we first thought.

Here's this week's batch of questions from his increasingly terrifying friend:

First day at new job. Why is everyone ignoring me?
Asking for a friend

First day at new job. Why is everyone ignoring me?
Asking for a friend

Should you stop sending funny videos of yourself to people at three in the morning whilst pissed? 
Asking for Zoë

If you've recently found out the earth is flat after all, not a globe, should you tell anyone? Asking for a friend

Are 1988 acid house ponytails still in vogue? Asking for a friend

Anyone want to buy a case of artisan slow death in a tin? 
Asking for a friend

Is it ok to use an old holiday photo for your Match.com profile pic? Asking for a friend

Is this enough pizza to send back if they sent the wrong one? Delivery driver is saying no.
Asking for a friend

Job lot of cute bears for sale. Anyone interested? Asking for a friend

Is it safe to snort Persil if you've run out of breakfast cocaine?
Asking for a friend

If this is your Facebook profile pic, will you finally get a girlfriend?
Asking for a friend