Asking For A Friend #1 – Attire Special

As you're surely all aware, instead of getting down to the daily grind at R$N Towers we spend most of our time on the look out for obtuse humour. Via the lizarding (allegedly) medium of Facebook, we stumbled across a fantastic chain of questions from the effortlessly funny Mitch Davis… that he was asking for a friend, of course.

We laughed so much that a little wee came out we decided that we should ask Mr Davis to "ask his friend" if we may serialise his mindspill/sparks of genius for your amusement. He kindly agreed.

We're kicking the series off with an attire special, obviously;

Is it too early to drink this tequila? Asking for a friend.

If I eat myself, will I disappear completely or grow twice as big? Asking for a friend.

How do you hide your number before doing nuisance calls? Asking for a friend.

43 and 21. Too much of an age gap? Asking for a friend.

If you smoked quite a lot of crystal meth three days ago, when will you stop being wide awake? Asking for a friend.

If a neighbour sees you looking at them through a telescope, accidentally pointed at their house, will they call the police? Asking for a friend.

Mitch Davis can be found running Numb Magazine amongst other things.